Yoga.

I’ve learned a lot in the past few months. Because I have this sudden desire to go to school again (extremely odd if you know me), but no money to do it, I’ve taken to teaching myself through reading. I love reading anyway, so I might as well.

Most recently I learned of the four main Yogas in the Hindu/Buddhist philosophies. Although they are nonthiestic, my guess is even a believer in Jesus can use them to better themselves. And regardless of the use/desired outcome my guess is that the general consensus is that one can become more.. still. More peaceful, more gentle, and altogether more content if these are practiced. Maybe not, maybe they work with certain personalities, but I think the double-point of these Yogas might be discipline. If you learn discipline in the attempt to perfect these practices, you can learn to apply that discipline in any area of your life, be it exercise, schooling, work, or even taking your dog for a walk.

A few interesting things. There are four types of these Yogas, and some are more a strain on the mind and body than others. The two I’m particularly intrigued by are Raja Yoga and Jnana Yoga. The latter, jnana, is Yoga focused on knowledge and learning. In Doubt: A History, the author says basically this is the path for intellectuals. Those who want to sit, think about things, and then find deeper complexity and meaning within them. Its basically a way of looking at yourself from a third view-from outside your body. It’s “supposed to be the shortest path to truth, but also the steepest”.

The other, Raja (or “royal”) Yoga, is most complicated and well-rounded. It has many parts within it, and its not just devoted to the mind, but to the physical body as well. Basically, the meditator focuses on cleanliness, contentment, self-control, etc and tries to free their mind and body of all controlling them (they take to celibacy, fasting, solitude to do this). It is a complete experience ridding oneself of any fake identity and any ties to the world.

Of course, these are much more complex than I have just described them, but then I just began learning about them. The idea soothes me though. It brings words and action to what I’v e been thinking on for the past few months. That I need to really embrace and learn from silence, that I need to keep my mouth shut sometimes, that I need to slow down and really let myself relax at times. Not relax in the boredom sense, because I’m plenty bored, but relax my nerves and my inner being.

Despite the religious, or nonreligious, background of any practices, I keep them all equally in mind as helpful. Its not mix and match as I see fit, its thinking of ways to better let go of worldly things, really focus my mind on other people and learn to be selfless, to serve, and to be content in doing so. I can’t remember the last time I was content in life.

I have a feeling this is a long, hard road. It sounds nice and peaceful and dandy, sitting and meditating and ridding myself of the worries of the world, but in all reality it IS a discipline. It’s something I’ll have to learn and really work at. It sounds like a paradox in itself: working at not-working? Striving to be at rest? Ah, but I feel the need to try. To let October be a month of healing—or at least the beginning of my healing process. And here I declare it for the sake of… um.. declaring.

Another thing mentioned was the Buddha saw no more nouns, only verbs. This was part of something called the Middle Way. In between self-indulgence and completely denying oneself of anything. But once truly experiencing The Middle Way, everything becomes a verb. I’m not me right now, I’m me-ing, or I guess BEing. That’s a strange concept in itself, but something I’m attempting to grasp.

I find it interesting the entire concept of participating in NaNoWriMo is what has spurred all of this. I want to use it to reconstruct my mind a little, to really focus and I think using this month to prepare, to learn a little discipline, will really help when November starts and I sit down to right my first two thousand words. Whatever this is a path TO, I hope there aren’t too many things in my way.